


Waiting game

by ZHIREM



Series: A moral spectrum [15]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Winter Soldier (Comics)
Genre: Grammer fail, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Underage Sex, No Beta, Written in less then 5 min, bestiality referenced
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-17
Updated: 2017-06-17
Packaged: 2018-11-15 05:09:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11223972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZHIREM/pseuds/ZHIREM
Summary: You don't always have to be proactive to get what you need.





	Waiting game

The office was dark, always dark. Trainlin watched the monitors...he remembered back, years and years. He used to sit with the patients during the night, keep them from killing themselves, keep them from hurting themselves, well hurting themselves too much. Now he watches them through monitors, they're prisoners now, not patients. Patients have rights...well some rights. Can't use cameras in bedrooms, they're used in the isolation and four-point rooms though. He is always amused by the drains in the middle of such rooms...shit, urine, rinsed down. The looks on the patients...prisoners faces when they see those drains..they always think such bad thoughts, the drains are harmless, but, but...it looks bad, so bad. 

He's watching one of the prisoners now, watching them breathing in and out. The prisonor is someone most people would say was an objectively horrible individual, kiddie raper, kiddie killer. It always bothered him that kid killers received harsher prison terms then people who kill adults. It bothers him that people who rape adults get less prison time then people who rape kids or geriatrics. It bothers him that people who rape women get less prison time then people who rape men...go on, tell me true, how much does your society value you? The people who rape women ages 16 - 35 almost never even get prosecuted successfully. Tell me again, how much society values you? 

He knows the lines he is broken down, the shatter points of his personality, he loved, or he thinks he loved a women once. It made his sensative. He was young, so young...she was a single mom. Long, wavy brown hair. Large, soft brown eyes. Anytime he biked past her house she had a kind word for him. Her son was a little older then him and never wanted to play, not really. He hated her son...her son ran away, left her alone, left her desperate. 

Later, after she was dead, and he was older he wondered if the only reason he noticed her, cared for her, was because he could practically smell the desperation and despair rolling off of her. 

Trainlin knows himself, he was never interested in being a doctor, never interested in being a psychiatrist, except, except there were these girls he dated, almost always girls, who pushed him to be successful, reach his potential. Whatever that means, meant. They lived to fail, lived to drown themselves in horror and regret.

Trainlin does everything he can to help his patients, but he's not surprised or disappointed when he almost always inevitably fails in helping them. There is a saying, more of a joke, you can work in mental health for 20 years and chances are you only ever really helped 2 people, if that. 

Most people who seek mental health don't really want help, they just want to jump through the hoops to get free of whatever consequences they are facing. The mental health rallying call 'let me help you to help yourself' is a joke. 

AA says you have to hit rock bottom before you can start to bring yourself back. Different people have different rock bottoms, and the definition and parimeters of that bottom are constantly being adjusted. 

That's why Trainlin was fine working in mental health, even if he had some...issues...he never hurt anyone, he just wasn't disappointed when he didn't help that many people, he liked to see them cry, liked to see them miserable, he didn't have to do anything to them, they did it to themselves. He was never tempted to make thing worse, they already were worse.

Being surrounded by abject human misery always did get him rock hard.

There's a patient, an outpatient, she has fantasies about kidnapping a child and raping them, killing them. She says she can't get it out of her mind, and that she always thinks about having dogs fuck them...she is physically stunning. Lovely eyes, nice hair, creamy skin, and her tits defy gravity, she works out enough to keep everything high and tight. 

She cries every session, she wants a lobotomy and to have her clit removed. The only thing Trainlin wants to do is bend her over and slam his dick home again and again as he strangles her.

Her desperation is intoxicating. 

He'll try to help her get the procedures done, but he can't help but fantasize about her...and...his fantasies don't bother him. 

Nothing ever really bothers him...that's why he's so good at his job. 


End file.
